I think we’ve all been faced with this one. You are on an assignment or project with the colleague from hell. The question is, how do you successfully work with this colleague, without damaging your reputation or being a push over?
I’m Heather Townsend, author of Poised for Partnership and co-author of How to Make Partner & Still Have a Life. I’m the leading global expert in what it takes to move from senior fee earner to partner . Here are 5 ways to work with me.
Here are 8 tips to deal with a tough work colleague:
1. Keep the lines of communication with your work colleague open
You can sort out most disagreements if the lines of communication are still open. Always aim to keep a dialogue going. As soon as those lines close, you risk damaging the success of the project.
2. Reframe the situation
Very often we have a story going on in our heads, which may or may not be true. It could be ‘so-and-so is lazy’ or ‘person x just wants to make my life difficult’ or ‘person y is not pulling his or her weight’. Very often these are just that, stories, and often only based on our perception rather than reality. Therefore, if you find yourself in this situation, take a few moments to reframe what could be going on. For example, instead of ‘so-and-so just wants to make my life difficult’, how about ‘so-and-so doesn’t realise how her behave impacts on me’. Sometimes finding a different angle on a situation can unlock the conflict
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3. Have a quiet conversation with the tough work colleague
Very often conflict in the work place comes about because of a difference in working styles and preferences.If you can have a quiet conversation about how their behaviour is impacting on you, it can often surface these conflict areas. Remember to strip out the emotion in this conversation!
4. Look for the positive in the other person
When someone is annoying us, it can be very easy to see the negatives in them. In fact our brain will be looking for evidence to back up our assessment that they are very tough to work with.
Even though it’s hard to do, start to look for the positives about working with them. Suddenly the positives may start to outweigh the negatives.
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5. Remain positive
Sometimes we are given the project assignment with the project team from hell. That’s life… If you can remain positive and upbeat through the assignment, you may come out with an enhanced reputation than if you let yourself get pulled down to the other people’s level.
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6. Have a safe group of people you can rant to
Having a sense of humour failure in the office can sometimes be detrimental to your long term career prospects. You don’t want to be seen as ‘unprofessional’ or ’emotionally immature’. Therefore assemble people around you, as part of your support team, who are unconnected to your workplace who you can safely release your frustration and vent too.
Read: 7 tips to build a team you can rely on and trust
7. Take 51% responsibility
Whilst it may be although other person’s fault, and they are just hell to work with. It normally takes two to tango when relationships go sour at work. Take a moment to consider that if you had some responsibility for the situation and relationship between you, what did you do to contribute to your difficult working relationship?
8. Have a conversation with your coach, buddy or mentor
Learning to deal with difficult people at work is just one of the skills lawyers, accountants and consultants need. Therefore, use your coach, mentor or work buddy to give you advice to mend the relationship.
If you think you’re ready to make partner, find out your “partner-ready” score when you take my Partnership Readiness Assessment.
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Take a step forward to be in control of your own career progression in your firm. Why not sign up to my weekly newsletter here and you’ll find out what you need to be working on in your career development (and how to make the time for your career development) to progress your career in your firm.
Read more about how to avoid making political mistakes and dealing with tough work colleagues
How to Deal with Professional Jealousy
12 ways to navigate & survive your firm’s politics
Partner Track Politics – transitioning from second in command to becoming the boss
I’m Heather Townsend, author of Poised for Partnership and co-author of How to Make Partner & Still Have a Life. I’m the leading global expert in what it takes to move from senior fee earner to partner . Here are 5 ways to work with me.
